It has snowed. The neighbourhood is covered in a blanket of white, the chill is in the air, nipping at your cheeks, Winter is on the way...
...blah blah friggin' BLAH.
Memo to Mother Nature: Could you not, just ONCE, wait until AFTER Halloween? I know we have to pay the price of living in the foothills of the Rocky Mountains somehow, but does it have to be NOW? Can't we just use November as our Flex Month for Weather Weirdness?
Okay, I know, I know. It's the end of October at a high altitude. What did I expect?
I'll tell you what I'm expecting now: Road accidents. Fender benders. Colds. Flu. Seasonal Affective Disorder. Bulky clothes. An extra ten minutes' preparation to go outside my house, and an extra half an hour lead time to travel anywhere safely.
Wah wah wah. Agent M is out there bawling and wetting his snowsuit.
What happened to the days when snow meant snowballs, skidooing (well, at least in New Brunswick where I was raised), sledding and building snow forts? When did snow become an imposition?
I mean, SNOW DAYS, for godssake. Mini-vacations away from the routine! Huzzah!
Only now I live in fear of denting my precious car, or tracking slush in on my nice clean floor.
My nice clean floor. Hel-LO, when did the Anal Police come and vaccu-suck my SPHINCTER shut?
I try not to be down about Winter. I mean, I AM a Winter-- I look great in black and the deep jeweltones that offset my coloring, accentuating...oh. Not THAT kind of Winter.
There's lots to look forward to, the first and foremost being the FOOD. Ooooh yes, the cozy comforts and cheery smells of homemade soups, apple cider, Wassail, pie, turkey, ham...AW yeah, it's Pack On The Pounds month but that's okay, because it's in ingrained survival method handed down by our ancestors.
(And the plus side is, now that I've done the Atkins diet, I know how to lose those pounds again RIGHT quick.)
In no other season is Staying In so very celebrated. DVD's, Xbox, PC games... entertainment at the fingertips. And if the power goes out, then there's candlelight, board games, cards, indoor campouts.
Yes, there's a lot of positivity to be had during the Winter months. It's just that I'm not the kind of person to look FORWARD to it. If I could spread my tiny wings and fly away, you better believe I'd be a snowbird and fly my ass to sunny Hawaii every year. As it is, every winter I buy some tanning minutes at the local Fake'n'Bake, because the light treatments alone make the grey-and-white world more bearable. And I advise anyone who feels down during the winter to do so, as well.
So when that blanket of white covers the cityscape, it's time to batten down the hatches and come up with a Game Plan, Agents, or else be caught miserable and downtrodden when Old Man Winter comes a-knockin'.
For now, though, I'm buying supplies for my Halloween Cocktails, because by God I'm having a good time on Halloween come Hell or High Snow.
Posted by Agent M at October 29, 2003 09:57 AMMost of the time, I love winter.
There is a certain serenity to the blanket of white covering everything. I even went for a walk in the snow last night, (bundled up to bejeezuz) just because there is a certain silence about a wintery night. The snow insulates and/or absorbs sound. I love that. Very peaceful.
What I do NOT love is the drive to work. I normally have a 45-minute (!) commute, that I don't enjoy as it is. (Yesterday, I didn't go to work, once I heard about buses and SUV's doing 360-degree ditch-spins on Deerfoot.)
Today, I'm at the office. Despite the fact that I took MrsACK's 4x4 to work, it still took me just over 80 minutes to get here. Almost double the time. I suspect the drive home will not be much better. ARGH.
So, I guess you could say that I enjoy weekend-winter. But other than that, I could do without the snow. ;)
When did snow become an imposition? Once we were old enough to shovel it. It only got worse from there. ;)
ACK!
You people are so spoiled. You think THIS is bad, you should see it when it snows in Toronto! That's REAL snow! Not like this isolationist city.
And when it REALLY snows, boy do the freaks come out at Shaw! Why, we get all kinds of calls from people whining about paying their bills in the snow! And wanting their service reinstated because they can't get to a mailbox in the winter! Like we have control over that!
And this one guy called bitching about his service not working. We had to tell him that his area was currently out-of-service due to the snowfall. He wanted it fixed right
away.
Like WE do that.
Posted by: Marie on October 30, 2003 11:54 AMI love winter, especially Calgary winter.
The cool dry crisp bite of winter air, the goopy, sloppy mix of shorts and mukluks on the intense chinook days, Christmas and my Birthday, the shimmer of tiny dry sparkling snow, or big floppy flakes the size of potato chips. Crunching the icy crust of a virgin snowbank in your insulated (!) boots, or feeling your Jeep snap to attention as you switch to 4x4 on the fly. Placing your palms on the face of the snow and feel the temperature drop, the numbness washes over, then the burn of overstimulated nerves. And or course, the roaring fireplace or steaming bath to pull the chills away. Looking good in tastefully co-ordinated layers of clothes. Whipping down a hillside on a crazy carpet turning to the right oh so gradually, slowly loosing control then you hit the jump at the bottom, the suddenly not so soft snow whomping the breath out of you, as you slide to a stop, regain your breath and tear through your 6 layers of clothes to dig out the lump of snow that has somehow appeared down the back of your shorts.
Lots of June babies. There's a reason for 'em.
Gosh I love winter. Whaddya you thing G-Thang?
I hate winter. Hate it with a passion. I didn't until a few years ago, when I got into the trades. But as soon as my job required that I had to work outside in miserable conditions, and drive to work and back over unpaved construction sites and new roads, I started to hate snow. Snow for me means that my usual commute to wherever I work is at least doubled in duration (or, like yesterday, went from a 10-minute drive to an hour and forty five minutes), that my intake of food increases (calories! Need 'em!), and that I come home cold. And I hate being cold. I don't have a lot in the way of insulation on my bones, so I don't keep warm well. Many layers of clothing makes it harder to work. Catch-22, eh?
The other thing I hate about winter is the dark. I get up in the dark, go to work in the dark, quite often perform my job somewhere dark, and then go home, again often in the dark. I too would be a snowbird if I could afford it.
I love Calgary in the summer, spring, and fall. It's so nice when it's green. It's a beautiful place to live. Except in winter. Ugh.
Garething
Posted by: Garething on October 30, 2003 06:40 PM...playoff football!... Lifesavers Storybooks... mandarin oranges... christmas stollen (sweetbread)... breaking your New Years resolutions by Jan 4... classic animated christmas stories... sweater meat... bacon (nothing to do with winter, I just like bacon)... "I want to be... a DENTIST!" (Gaayyyy...)... pro/college football, hockey, pro/college basketball Winter Olympics and the Brier!... EGG F'N NOG BABY!
Agent Snow Miser
Posted by: Agent Brucie on October 30, 2003 07:04 PM*CK sticks his hand up*
Ah, Agent Brucie? "Sweater meat"? WTF?
And I'd just like to add that anyone who wears the oh-so-attractive combo of shorts and mukluks should be vaporized...just on principle. ;)
ACK!
PS - Egg Nog RULES.
Posted by: Agent CK on October 31, 2003 08:58 AMHaving just seen "Men With Brooms," I'm going to assume that "The Brier" is in fact a Curling championship. Which, for those of you outside Canada, is a game like shuffleboard on the ice with 40 pound rocks. I'm pretty sure it had to be invented by the damn Scots.
Hey, Agent Brucie? Remember when handing in your Field Notes to Agent Central that your audience is educated but uninformed. Please confirm what the hell "The Brier" and "Sweater Meat" are.
M
Posted by: Agent M on October 31, 2003 10:02 AMSweater meat = breasts.
Bruce is appreciative of how a nice a tight sweater looks on members of the fairer sex.
But then, aren't we all.
Posted by: Quixote on October 31, 2003 01:10 PMThe Brier... a bonnie bonspiel! It's a wee bit crispy! Now dance, monkey!
A form fitting knit sweater on a well formed woman, preferrably red, with a grey thigh-to-knee length tweed skirt and black knee boots, a bonnie winter sight to warm the heart of any man on a cold winter night (except for the non-traditional variety males, of course).
Posted by: Agent Brucie on October 31, 2003 05:22 PM