I'm in shock over the furor that North America is in over Gay Marriage.
Suddenly it seems as if our society has found its new Negro to marginalize, ridicule and threaten to change nation's constitutions over.
Gays. They're out, they're loud, and they're in our faces. And by god, their unreasonable demands for equal rights are threatening our lives! Yes! They want to get MARRIED. And that totally denigrates the very institution of marriage, and directly threatens to crumble the marriages that have already been established...
...doesn't it?
Oh wait, that's right: NO. It doesn't.
I am constantly ashamed of the human condition. I don't mean it as a perpetual shame, but rather that as soon as I begin to feel proud of what we can and have achieved, someone has to stand up and whip the crowd into a mob, an unfeeling stupid animal with many faces, all of which are etched in fear and outrage.
I used to think the Reverend Phelps was a comedy act; a tasteless "American Stereotype Nutjob" that paraded around with a teeny tiny little cult following.
And now I wonder if that's what my ancestors thought when the Ku Klux Klan started.
Hatred unconfronted is hatred assented to. It's fact. And it's now. It IS HAPPENING. It's easy to distance the events by blaming, say, the American Moron In The White House-- oh, I'd guess you'd call him the President-- and say he has created a climate of dangerous fearmongering and intolerance. Or the government of the province I currently live in, whose red-nosed obesity of a Premier has loudly vaunted that this province will NEVER have gay marriage; apparently he has declared himself immortal and will be in office in perpetuity.
It would be easy to say that these are the reasons why this current misanthropic culture du jour exists. But that's overgeneralizing. "This culture" is made up of PEOPLE. Of INDIVIDUALS. Some of whom shout loudly but don't know what they're saying, or even why they're shouting. They're just going along with the crowd. These are our friends and neighbours, they live next door, we share space with them and see them every day.
And then there's that person in the mirror. Are you the same person you were yesterday? Is there a person that was out in a crowd, shouting slogans, yelling, damning other human beings with their voice? Is that the person in your mirror who today is a mother of two or a single man in fear of being discovered?
Courage. That's what it comes down to. Do we have the courage to OPPOSE FEAR? Do we have the courage to defend an unpopular minority not because we're part of it, but because we must fight fear and injustice?
Lepers used to be shunned or set on fire. Because they had a communicable disease. They used to round them up, barricade them into a small village and set it on fire.
Ludicrous, no? Perhaps they had reason. After all, these were the Dark Ages we're talking about. They had no way to study, understand or control disease; survival was at stake.
And when AIDS became an official epidemic in the 1980's, could anyone else hear the subliminal howls of "burn the village?" I could. It was fear talking. On our televisions, in our newspapers, and in our legislature.
Funny, last time I voted I didn't notice a candidate named Fear or Panic on the ballot. I remember because I wouldn't have voted for them. Nor, I'm sure, would any sensible person who wasn't at that moment being inundated by repeated telecasts warning them that The Gay was out there and their children could catch it.
But we moved on from that, somewhat uncomfortably. We know about AIDS now, moreso than we did in the 80's. "Gay" means "Homosexual" to us now, and we all know what that is and that it's here to stay, whether we agree with the lifestyle (as if homosexuality needed "permission" to exist) or not.
I want to share with you a song I heard today, that was originally written in 1984. It was written by The Bronski Beat, from an album titled "Age of Consent," and it was very politically about gay rights at the time. It is titled simply, "Why?":
"Contempt in your eyes
As I turn to kiss his lips
Broken I lie
All my feelings denied
Blood on your fist
Can you tell me why?
You in your false securities
Tear up my life
Condemning me
Name me an illness
Call me a sin
Never feel guilty
Never give in
Tell me why?
You and me together
Fighting for our love
Can you tell me why?"
1984. Twenty YEARS ago, and it could have been written yesterday considering its relevance to the issues surrounding homosexual love today.
It sickens me to think that in twenty years of my life, the world around me seems to have learned nothing.
I urge everyone reading this, whether you agree with gay marriage, the homosexual lifestyle or just homosexuality in general, to consider very carefully: These are human beings. Regardless of how we may feel about them, or the homeless, or disabled people, or those of a different race than we, or of a different gender, prejudice is prejudice. To deny the right to marry is to deny the right to love. To deny homosexuals the right to practice their homosexuality is LITERALLY denying other human beings the right to love.
And what exactly are our fears based on? Is your marriage less because the lesbians down the street are happy? Are your children in danger because the quiet gay couple next door is playing a Judy Garland record?
I urge you all to think. Thought can conquer fear. From lack of fear comes enlightenment. From enlightenment comes inspiration, and from there comes our future. Join me in helping to create a decent one, won't you?
Posted by Agent M at February 17, 2004 01:18 PMI really think that you should sell this article to a paper!!!
Posted by: your mom on February 17, 2004 01:34 PMSome of those against gay marriage say that allowing homosexuals to marry will lessen the value of their own marriages. To me a divorce rate of 60+% devalues marriage more so.
Posted by: Troy on February 20, 2004 03:54 PMBEING A GAY PERSON IS BEING GENETICALLY ILL.
I don't have much to add, really, but I feel like I should explain this.
Gay people should have the same rights as anyone else, but except for getting married, having children and being a model (in any way) for young people. Choosing to be gay they also choosed not to get married, not to have children, not to work as a school teacher... In most of big European cities, every year gays have their 'love paraids', celebrating their SICKNESS. Did you see people who have AIDS celebrating their sickness? Would you approve of someone who has AIDS to work in your child's kindergarden? That is not the same, you'll say. Ofcourse it's not, but it is close enough. Watching gay people around, kids get confused and think that loving (not liking) a person of the same sex is good, and how often do young people mix up loving and liking very much?
In the past decade, I see that young people are more or less encouraged to be gay. Popular characters in fancy soap operas are gay, are they not? I mean, look at 'Will and Grace': rewards, popularity,...
When I look around me, I think that being gay is in. And if you have no psihological resistance... well, soon you are gay too.
There are more 'confused people' than gays, really. How could someone be confused? Well, try having extasy and being touched behind by another man. Then tell me what you felt, and if it was good.
If someone should EVER let gay people to get married and have children (world wide), that would erase the only solid reason these confused children have not to be gay.
Maca
Posted by: Maca on February 23, 2004 06:55 AMI fail to see how gays getting married can do any more damage to the instution of marriage than Larry King, Liz Taylor, and Britney Spears already have. If anything, gays may be responsible for helping restore sanctity to the concept of marriage.
My 2 cents - your mileage may vary.
Posted by: Sean on February 26, 2004 04:14 PMMarriage is a word, just a word... It encompasses two people who have announced they will devote the rest of their lives together.
Personally, if two men or two women are doing this, it is fine by me. It builds a realationsip on trust and circumstance which will eventually end, with or without a divorce. It legalizes the commitment to buildign a home together, as well as something very important for the two involved.
Inheritance. I hate to devlove the whole argument down to that, but inheritance between two consenting adults when one passes away is far easier if there is a document recognizing their commitment to each other in the creation of a home. Right now the children or relations of either one of the partners can pretty much legally take anything or everything if the person passes away, and that plain just isn't right.
Sex (the act) is a satisfaction of skin at its' most basic definition, and a marriage is an agreement between two. Gender should have no place limiting either one of those definitions.
>BEING A GAY PERSON IS BEING GENETICALLY ILL.
Speaking of being ill...
(...and I ain't touchin' the rest of Macas post...)
ACK!
Dear Maca:
It would seem that you are having a knee-jerk reaction to the topic, and that your arguments are not well thought out at all. Let me illustrate:
BEING A GAY PERSON IS BEING GENETICALLY ILL.
...and right after that you say:
When I look around me, I think that being gay is in. And if you have no psihological resistance... well, soon you are gay too.
There are more 'confused people' than gays, really. How could someone be confused? Well, try having extasy and being touched behind by another man. Then tell me what you felt, and if it was good.
Right away you've contradicted yourself. It's either genetic or it's a choice, goes the argument, but you've presented both points as fact. Make up your mind.
Gay people should have the same rights as anyone else, but except for getting married, having children and being a model (in any way) for young people.
Either they have the same rights as anyone else or they don't. Did you know that these same arguments were made against BLACK PEOPLE in America in the 1960's? These people are HUMAN BEINGS, Maca. You can't start giving them "marginal rights" because you don't agree with their lifestyle.
Choosing to be gay they also choosed not to get married, not to have children, not to work as a school teacher...
Once again, it's either genetic or a choice. I'm guessing you favor "choice" as the reason for homosexuality. And once again, in your mind you're denying rights to homosexuals. "They should have the same rights as everyone else EXCEPT..." I suspect your list goes on until they, in fact, have NO rights.
In most of big European cities, every year gays have their 'love paraids', celebrating their SICKNESS. Did you see people who have AIDS celebrating their sickness? Would you approve of someone who has AIDS to work in your child's kindergarden?
AIDS and homosexuality are not the same thing, nor do they go hand in hand. 70% of AIDS cases are from heterosexual intercourse. Did you know that? Also, you're once again contradicting yourself. Now it's not a choice, it's a sickness? Make up your mind.
The reason those "love parades" exist is to protect the homosexual community from small-minded people like you, Maca. So that people like you cannot trivialize, marginalize, lock away or, ultimately, start imprisoning or executing homosexuals just because they exist.
That is not the same, you'll say. Ofcourse it's not, but it is close enough. Watching gay people around, kids get confused and think that loving (not liking) a person of the same sex is good, and how often do young people mix up loving and liking very much?
God FORBID that children should learn to love. God FORBID that they should grow up unaware of hate or prejudice. And God FORBID that a child should have any positive role models for its sexuality. Homosexuality may or may not be genetic-- that hasn't been proven EITHER way-- but some kids do grow up to be homosexuals. Don't you think you should teach them NOT to hate themselves?
In the past decade, I see that young people are more or less encouraged to be gay. Popular characters in fancy soap operas are gay, are they not? I mean, look at 'Will and Grace': rewards, popularity,...
Or maybe they're just positive role models that homosexuals can be just as popular and as rewarded as straight people. And that they don't all have AIDS, like some small-minded people believe.
If someone should EVER let gay people to get married and have children (world wide), that would erase the only solid reason these confused children have not to be gay.
Of course. Because the only thing keeping the children from turning gay is that they can't get married.
Maca, a couple of posts ago you were sad that in your country people could be taken off the street, rounded up, have their rights taken away. That they didn't have the power to vote or speak out against their government. And now here you are oppressing and hating and totally misunderstanding homosexuals.
I think you need to take a good long hard look in your mirror and ask yourself just how small-minded and filled with hate you really are. And then ask yourself if there's someone you know who feels confused about their gay feelings.
Because I bet that someone is closer than you think.
You have a right to your opinion, but please don't ask anyone to buy into your ludicrous arguments when you can't even keep them straight in your own mind. Pun intended.
M
Posted by: Agent M on March 10, 2004 10:28 AMI tried several times to load this page weeks ago, and failed, so I thought that I have been banned or something. After reading these, I'm not so sure I wasn't.
The only conclusion I can make is that you can't reach the hights of my thoughts. You didn't understand a single line of what I've written.
With such a strong gay-loving opinion of yours, I didn't expect a pleasent reaction, but I dare say that this was too much for me. If I could meet you or speak to you, agent M, I would - because this kind of things get to me more than I would like, and keep following me long afterwords. Without a possibility to fix what happened (and personal contact would be the only way), I don't see a reason ever to visit this pages again.
Maca
P.S. And, for the record, I am not gay. I'm a happily married mother of four.
Posted by: Maca on March 19, 2004 08:33 AMYour thoughts aren't at any "height." They're quite low, actually. As in, the lowest common denominator.
I'm glad you're a happily married mother of four. What a pity you won't allow homosexuals the potential of being the same.
M
Posted by: Agent M on March 19, 2004 10:16 AM